Today I had a meeting with Matt, I booked in to see him at 2pm to discuss my images, my WordPress and use it as a last opportunity to ask him questions before we hand all our work in next week. Now, I wasn’t expecting all positives to come from this meeting, I was expecting some negatives to come from it, and to be given some changes to make, but I didn’t expect my whole half an hour meeting to be all negatives and pretty much no positives.
Put it this way, I left this meeting feeling really disheartened, unappreciated, stressed, upset and really disappointed with my work. Usually, I wouldn’t post anything like this on my WordPress, and haven’t done about any tutors before, but I feel like I need to address this and say how it made me feel towards my project.
I started off my meeting by showing Matt my images, the first round I took with the soft box light and the second round I retook with the flash gun. Matt didn’t seem to say any positives about my images as I was explaining which ones I liked and why, I was going through them and kept getting the two sets confused as he kept saying that the lighting wasn’t as good in the first set of images compared to the second set, which I kept reminding him was because the first set weren’t done with a flash. Another comment he made about my images was that the plastic bottles made ‘ugly’ images, now I know he probably meant it about how the bottles looked in the images overall, but I couldn’t help but take it personally and think that he was saying my images were ugly. I said to Matt that I quite liked my bottle images, as they referenced the plastic in the ocean taking over animal habitats in the water, and again he reiterated that the bottles were ugly and that he didn’t like them.
While then going through more of my images with Matt, he wasn’t pleased at who I photographed in my pictures and kept making the statement “you should’ve used a proper model”. Now, this didn’t sit right with me as it wasn’t very practical for me to get a “proper model” in. Other people in my class didn’t use “proper models” they used people they knew, and even people on the course, and Matt didn’t make the comment to them, so why did he make it to me?
Im not being funny but what classes someone as a “proper model”? If Matt was referring to an agency model, as a proper model, then let me say why it wouldn’t have been practical or possible for me to find one (for free bearing in mind). I have used agency models before (for free), and the agency only accept the free job for the models if they get some benefits from it for their portfolio. And I’m not being funny, but no agency model would agree to work on a shoot like this as it wouldn’t look good in their portfolio. No agency model would want to travel down to Hertfordshire where I had use of a bathtub, submerge themselves in dirty bath water and then be covered in plastic. They wouldn’t want to feature that in their portfolio, and if they did really want to do the shoot, they would most likely charge me for it as they wouldn’t benefit from it, and they’d have to travel quite far. Even if an agency model did agree to work on this style shoot with me, but couldn’t travel to Hertfordshire, I would have to try and find a bath tub somewhere to do my shoot in? I can’t afford to hire one in a studio or anything so using one close to home for free was very practical. As I said before, this comment about using a “proper model” wasn’t made to anyone else but me? Why?…
Next thing Matt commented on was the contact sheets I had on my WordPress, I have uploaded contact sheets before for previous projects, and never been told to take them down or edit them so the images were larger? So why have I now? Matt saw the contact sheets on my WordPress and said ‘he hates looking a them as they’re an eyesore’. Again, I know other people in my class who have used contact sheets on their WordPress, with pictures the same size and even smaller than mine, and he didn’t make a comment to them about it? So again, why did he make the comment to me?
Matt told me at the start of my meeting that my WordPress was ‘looking good’ which I was pleased about. But during the meeting, Matt was telling me to put my cross reference animal images on my WordPress, which I already had done before this meeting, so has he even looked at my WordPress? He must’ve done as he said it was ‘looking good’ but didn’t see that I had already put up what he asked me to?
The only useful things to come from this meeting was Matt showed me some art work called ‘Story of Ophelia’ to look at and reference and he also showed me how to crop down my images better and slightly adjust the black and white editing.
As I said at the very start of this post, I left this meeting feeling very disheartened, unappreciated for the amount of work I had done, stressed, upset and disappointed in my own work. I left feeling like I wanted to start everything again and that my images weren’t good enough, and don’t feel confident that I will come out with a good grade from this unit.